There is a well-known Buddhist story which I often use in my clinic when I try to encourage patients.
The story is about a man who came shouting angrily at Buddha. However, Buddha remained unaffected by him. Others observed this.
Afterwards they were curious, so they asked Buddha “Why did you not get upset?” and “How did you manage to stay so calm?”
And then Buddha did what so many other wise souls do. He answered them by asking a question.
“If someone gives you a gift and you choose not to receive it, to whom then does the gift belong?”
The answer of course is that the gift stays with the giver.
Sometimes things get dumped on us unjustly. People who are hurting are often excellent at hurting others. It may be that you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time and somebody felt it was time to kick the cat.
The solution may be to have compassion for them. Send them love. Forgive. Move forward. Let it go. Do not stew over the past—its done. Nobody can have a better past.
Simply refuse to take their gift and live life true to yourself. Buddha lived a life by example and to this day this story about how he refused to accept a gift is a tool I use to help parents deal with false guilt, unjust criticism and unappreciative family members.
It is really simply a matter of asking “to whom then does the gift belong?”